Bit of comedy for the night...

[smash]

Ok all.

What's the weirdest thing that anyone has tried to pay you in/with?

I just refused payment in cracked plugs.... "Well these plugs usually cost $10K so that have got to be worth at least $1000 towards the cost of doing this work for me."

When I politly refused, and told the client that I didn't use crakcs becuase I only used tools that I knew to be reliable, he told me that I obviously wasn't a professional.

Lol.

I know some of you must have some clangers out there.

[Simon B]

I grew up in regional NSW, it was common to pay for stuff in slabs of beer, I remember when I was younger my father was doing a bakery run and a place in the blue mountains paid for the delivery with a really expensive bread roll that I ate.............

I grew up with a father that would rather barter then use cash so I could tell a heap

[heathen]

[quote="smash"]Ok all.

What's the weirdest thing that anyone has tried to pay you in/with?

I just refused payment in cracked plugs.... "Well these plugs usually cost $10K so that have got to be worth at least $1000 towards the cost of doing this work for me."

When I politly refused, and told the client that I didn't use crakcs becuase I only used tools that I knew to be reliable, he told me that I obviously wasn't a professional.

Lol.

I know some of you must have some clangers out there.[/quote]



Times really must be tough, Smash how un-professional of you to want money geez. Ok so who wants to master an album i'm working on? I can pay you with one of my girlfriends cheese cakes, is that fair ?Oh come on please?

That is a clanger alright.

[smash]

Ironically, the work that I was doing for the client was to fix his studio computers, as all 3 were running very unstably.

Idiot.

[norm]

In a previous life I was a Pawn Broker. Two things come to mind. I was offered four tons of Barramundie fillet on one occasion and on another I was offered the girlfriend for the night (she was going to be in it too). I dont know why but I knocked them both back.....but maybe, just maybe I should have taken the Barra.

[Aearth]

I do plumbing work and get offered a slab of beer for the job from time to time. Now is ok but at plumbers rates I want a ute full of the stuff.

Hey Norm what did the barra look like? Nothing worse than eating an ugly barra.

Nick

[rick]

i had a guy from a legit double bay high fashion house offer me $1000 worth of menswear for $1000 worth of mastering for his wife
i said no...
he rang back and offered $2000 worth of mens stuff for $1000 worth of mastering for his wife

i still said no

he rang back a third time and offerred to dress MY WIFE for the season

so what did i say ..?

sure come on in :)

we still wear his stuff it seems to be an ongoing thing


i did a record for a stripper while i was in the cross, she paid her bill in cash and then still felt that she had to make me an offer i could not understand
and it was good for anytime i liked apparately ...

[chris p]

This could really start a trend - Dave MC, want to give me your pair of 421's in exchange for writing a will for you and your wife? How about, I'll do your next house conveyance for the Neve compressors? :-)

My impression is that the forum community here prefers the feel of hard cash.

Just remember, folks, that the taxman will not be held off - even barter trades attract GST on the market value of the goods exchanged, so with barter BOTH sides must collect and remit GST (unless, of course, they are second hand in which case there is no GST applicable).

[davemc]

This could really start a trend - Dave MC, want to give me your pair of 421's in exchange for writing a will for you and your wife? How about, I'll do your next house conveyance for the Neve compressors? :-)

I have had some worse offers then that you know.
I do not know if it is because of $1 NR ebay auctions, although when your selling stuff now you get a lot of people offer you next to nothing.
Yeah you can just delete the email, although I think its a little rude to offer 50% less then what someone has them for sale. Then go on about there really not even worth that. Well why do they want them then he he
Hopefully a lot sells this week and finds good homes.

Nothing wrong with bartering though. I got my old studio painted for a weeks recording plus paint.
If anyone here does Gardens, Awnings or SPA's something could be arrnaged for some gear.

[Mark Bassett]

I've got a mate who gave a guy a bottle of JD he stole from Grinspoon's rider to tattoo him in his kitchen. Needless to say, the tatt's average.

[wez]

i have a great client who is a painter (of the artistic variety), he paid me for a job with a series of paintings (at my suggestion), they are in my lounge room and look fabulous.... he has another record coming up soon, and i need something to spruce up the office, so no reason we won't do it again.

ars pro artis

[zedsoundz]

My old boss was a right arsehole!

I'm a painter(house variety). One payday (before I was liscenced) this bloke advised me that I wouldn't be getting paid for another two weeks. I said I'd forget about the pay if he let me use his Solver account up to the value of what I was owed. He reluctently agreed...So I went straight to solver bought all the tools I could (at half retail price) and quit work the next day to start out on my own... Haven't looked back.

Umm... I was paid two cartons of woodstock and coke for the last EP I mixed. nuthing like undercutting the compettition:)

Z

[Martin]

got paid in lessons which seemed a pretty fair deal

often playing gigs so its good to polish up on technique from people who really know their stuff...

my knowledge for theirs, hard to put a price on

[Sheer Noise]

I recently did a photography job for an electrician who offered to put downlights through my house at cost price if I did his wedding album at cost... works for me! :)

Dave.

[Peter Knight]

I recently did a photography job for an electrician who offered to put downlights through my house at cost price if I did his wedding album at cost... works for me! :)

Dave.

What's cost price for a wedding album these days? 5 grand? LOL

[Sheer Noise]

hahaha....

our books are shipped from NZ, and without prints, the book themselves work out costing us around $800 each.... printing ranges between $200 and $400 depending on the layout. So cost for a wedding album can be up to $1200. (more if you want extras like motifs on the cover or whatever....) And people wonder why photographers charge so much!!!


All fun and games

[Kris]

just so long as you don't charge people hundreds extra for the negatives....especially after they've already paid for the film!

Cheeky some wedding photographers are.

[rick]

its pretty standard for wedding photographers to sling you extra for the negatives and usually after "aunt bessie" has ordered all hers ( about a year later things suddenly get a lot cheaper

i explained to our wedding photographer that although it may be his standard to keep the negatives and his right to do what ever he wanted with them
at MY wedding we would let him charge us for his books but he could not use any shots of me or my guests at my wedding for any reason whatsoever without my written approval .

why are you or your guests famous or something he said ....?
"perhaps" i said "but its a deal breaker so do you want the job or not...?"
he coughed and agreed

on the wedding night he kept coming up to me all night asking if kylie had arrived yet
perhaps i kept saying ... perhaps

[Sheer Noise]

still smirking!!!

We give the negatives to the client after two years, or they can be purchased "up-front" for $500. They're really about the only place you make any money, but we find that people are willing to pay $500 if they really want to do a lot of big prints, and if not, they wait two years. We actually give a disk of all photos suitable for printing up to 5x7 anyway, which kind of makes people ok with waiting a couple of years for the big wedding poster to put on the wall!!

Rick... We have all our clients (wedding/portrait/bands) sign a model release that lets us use any photos for promotional purposes and seek a separate release for commercial purposes... I probably would have agreed to not use yours... but then, I won't climb church towers... so I wouldn't have got the gig anyway right! Besides, wasn't one of the countries leading photographers in your bridal party! :P

Dave.

[Peter Knight]

We actually give a disk of all photos suitable for printing up to 5x7 anyway, which kind of makes people ok with waiting a couple of years for the big wedding poster to put on the wall!!

How many still want it after 2 years? :P

[wez]

how many still married after two years?

[Kris]

oh dear, such a cynical bunch...

I wanted my negs because a) I paid for them! At $55 a roll for processing I had better get them.

b) I told the photographer I had a Millenium 2k film scanner and wanted to scan them and colour grade them myself using the Davinci 2k grading system. She kinda looked blank and said.... "ok".

I went with her because I liked her work (we got married at night in low light.... hundreds of candles) and she didn't fight the neg request. So many others did though. But ultimately she did what we asked and was really cruisy to work with. We were only engaged for 2 1/2 months but it all came together so well.

[rick]

" Besides, wasn't one of the countries leading photographers in your bridal party! "

....err perhaps

[Sheer Noise]

if they're still married..... almost all couples come get their neg's straight on two years... if not, we remind them, and they come pick them up.

Kris... what else you got? :)

[Kris]

I don't have the 2k anymore as I've changed companies but we'd just commissioned a killer DI suite.... Northlight film scanner (4k) and a Baselight colour grading system with Barco digital cinema projector. Absolute power.

[smash]

Kinda roughly on the same topic...

Just had a client who had a cheap bali DVD disintergrate (!!!) in the DVD drive of his brand new machine.

Apparently the serivce guys are now seeing this regularily.

[mark rachelle]

OK I gotta say this story as the band has broken up
mitch Kenny will vouch for me
anyway this great band I had in the studio had been great payers and had become good mates
anyway after 3 weeks in the studio they said whilst we were all getting a little intoxicated whilst passing round a scoob (this was 10 years ago!) can they have a free day in the studio

Well i thought to myself no worries, but in the tradition of aussie mates i had to make em work for it, So i said to the gtrst can I borrow your girlfriend for a night for me and my girfriend, Like you do!!!!!!

What suprised me without a bat of an eyelid is that she said OK (now thats support for the band and her boyfreind isn't it) however the gtrst wasn't so keen. (why i have no idea)

Anyway I had to say no to the free day, however as the night went we all got very intoxicated to the point where it resembled dares from an ozzy osborne biography. So I said to the guys in the band Mr Bass Player, you shove that that drumstick up Mr gtrsts butt and you mr singer, you light that drum stick, and light a joint up from that burning drum stick sticking out of the gtrsts butt. smoke it and i want pictures and then you get a free day.

No Freakin way they said, Anyway later that night I went to bed and the singer and his then wife are good freinds and they were staying in the spare room of my house. soooo i trundle off to bed about 3 in the morning and later i wake up to find 10 people giggling in my room.

all of a sudden mr gtrst jumps up on the bed greases up a drum stick with margerine and PLOINK in it goes, and let me say that he didn't need to hold it in it was well and truely anchored, and true to form the rest of the dare was completed and they got a free day in the studio.

However the ratbags left that greased up drumstick in my room, as well as gladrapped my toilet (luckily i spotted it before any pronblems were encountered). anyway as i was first up and with the help of some gloves i managed to pick up the drumstick and then proceeded to give a nice little upper lip massage with the brown end of the drumstick to all of the sleeping/hungover band members (the hitler as its called) .

good laughs and i miss those days in the studio

anyone up for a free day!

[Martin]

hahaha thats rock and roll! least they got what was coming to them via that drum stick!

i guess all the stock brokers out there have a forum like this with tales of similar adventures........(or not?)

[smash]

Don't know about the stockbrokers, but if you're involved in the advertising or design world, clientcopia.com is great for a laugh.